


All of You

by The_Busy_Beee



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Fluff, Kozume Kenma is a Good Friend, M/M, Near Death Experiences
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-23
Updated: 2020-04-23
Packaged: 2021-03-02 05:22:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,167
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23809816
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_Busy_Beee/pseuds/The_Busy_Beee
Summary: Life can be unexpected and accidents can happen in the blink of an eye.Kuroo learns that first hand.--"'m sorry, Tetsu," Bokuto mumbles, eyes closed, "My eyes won't stay open… I'm so tired…""Don't fall asleep," Kuroo begs again, quieter, pressing his forehead against Bokuto's, "not now- not now, Bo-""I love you," Bokuto murmurs, eyelids fluttering again, "I love you, Tetsu,"
Relationships: Bokuto Koutarou/Kuroo Tetsurou
Comments: 14
Kudos: 175





	All of You

**Author's Note:**

> I made myself cry while writing this at least twice, so I really hope the person I wrote it for enjoys it. 😭💖  
> They requested BoKuto angst and I have delivered!

He really didn’t think it was possible, but Bokuto and Kuroo end up with even  _ less _ time to be together after graduating high school. Kuroo had hoped, naive though it was, that as “adults”, they’d be able to go on dates whenever they wanted, but with his class schedule being full and Bokuto being scouted by a national team… Dating isn’t the first thing on either of their minds. Which is why they haven’t seen each other in person in almost a month now.

He’s not mad about it, obviously. They’re both busy trying to make their dreams come true.

But he’d be lying if he said he didn’t miss Bokuto’s carefree smile and tight hugs. He misses feeling Bokuto’s muscled arms around his waist, tugging him close and lifting him up in the air. Kuroo misses the citrusy smell of his body wash and the soft flowery scent of Sakusa’s special laundry detergent. Kuroo knows Bokuto has his own, but he always ends up using the other man’s detergent because it’s nearby and he doesn’t want to go all the way back to his dorm. It makes Kuroo laugh every time he smells it because he just  _ knows _ Sakusa probably had a fit about it.

Butterflies wreak havoc in his stomach as they train comes to a halt, the overhead speaker announcing that this is Kuroo’s stop has Kuroo rubbing his slightly sweaty palms off on his jeans, nervous for absolutely no reason.

He and Bokuto have been dating for  _ years _ now. Getting nervous about seeing Bokuto for the first time in a month is ridiculous- right?? It’s not like they haven’t talked almost every day. Bokuto still sends him photos and updates on practice and tells him good morning. Kuroo sends pictures of the complicated equations he’s doing in class and sends good night selfies- it’s not like they’ve never gone a month without meeting up before.

But maybe it’s the weight of the spare key in his jacket pocket that’s making him feel nervous.

Kenma has been pestering him since graduation about when they’re going to move in together, but with Bokuto having to stay in the dorms for the first year, it wouldn’t have been possible until the second year- and then Bokuto kept talking about how much fun he had in the dorms, and how he enjoyed being with all his teammates all the time. Kuroo couldn’t find the right time to bring it up. So, instead of trying to bring up finding a new place together, he’s just decided to give Bokuto a key to his own place.

It’s not a request for him to move in- not right away at least. But this way, Bokuto can come and go as he pleases, whether Kuroo is home or not. He wants Bokuto to feel comfortable in his apartment. 

_ So comfortable that he won’t want to leave, _ Kuroo thinks with a small laugh. 

_ “Kuroo~!”  _ Pictures don’t do Bokuto’s smile justice, Kuroo decides, because right now, Bokuto truly looks gorgeous with his backwards baseball cap and form fitting t-shirt. Kuroo can feel himself smiling as well, heart swelling as Bokuto hops off the small brick wall and races towards him. He can feel people staring as Bokuto whirls him around, but he can’t bring himself to care at all; Kuroo’s hands are fisted in the back of Bokuto’s black sports jacket and everything is right in the world again.

"I missed you," Kuroo mumbles against Bokuto's shoulder, and the arms tighten around him just the slightest bit.

"I missed you too!" Bokuto says sincerely. They're both smiling when they finally separate. Their hands find each other's without having to look, fingers twining together as they walk. Kuroo isn't sure what the plan for today is. He probably should have made one or asked Bokuto but he was too excited when he found out Bokuto had the whole weekend off practice; all he's been able to think about since Wednesday is being able to see Bokuto again.

"Should we get lunch?" Bokuto asks, swinging their hands between them gently. "Or see a movie?"

"Hmm," Kuroo hums, "I could definitely go for a cheeseburger. You?"

"Ahh, I was kinda thinking about a hamburger steak." Bokuto laughs. Kuroo grins.

"Family restaurant?"

"Family restaurant!"

\---

They eat and talk for close to two hours. At first, Kuroo wasn't sure what they'd have to talk about, considering they talk every day anyways, but they found more than a few things to talk about. Even the silences they lapsed into while eating or waiting for the food to be served felt comfortable, and Kuroo loves this feeling; the feeling of being with someone you just feel comfortable with, no matter what you're doing.

"I ate too much," Bokuto whines, rubbing his stomach gingerly as they make their way down the street again.

"I told you not to eat that entire parfait," Kuroo chides, still smirking. 

"But it was so good! Throwing it away would have been a waste!" Bokuto protests. Kuroo shrugs, tucking his hands in the pockets of his jeans.

"Looks like you just gotta suffer then, Babe."

"It's fine!" Bokuto says, suddenly straightening up, "I can handle anything!"

"So you'd be fine if I said I wanted to go to the amusement park next?" Kuroo raises a brow and Bokuto deflates.

"Please have mercy on me," he begs. Kuroo barks out a laugh, bumping Bokuto's shoulder with his own.

"I wouldn't do that to you," he laughs. "Arcade, maybe? You mentioned the movies, is there anything good playing?" 

"Oh!" Bokuto says suddenly, "Hinata said that that new hero movie is out now! It looked cool in the advertisements!"

"I'm down for a good action flick," Kuroo agrees easily, tugging his phone free from his pocket. "I'll look up showtimes."

"While you do that, I'll duck into the convenience store and grab snacks." Bokuto starts towards the small convenience store a couple doors down.

"We just had lunch!" Kuroo laughs but doesn't protest further. He can't stop grinning as he leans against the brick wall of the convenience store and scrolls through movie listings and times at the nearest theater. The movie Bokuto must have been talking about has another showing in an hour, and that should give them plenty of time to get to there on time. Just to make sure seats are still available, he buys the tickets online instead of waiting to pay at the box. 

_ Bang! Bang! _

Kuroo startles violently, cell phone falling out of his hand and smacking against the concrete at the sudden loud and incredibly close gunshots. A man comes bursting through the convenience store doors, a large bag in his arms, and barrels down the street, not looking back, and Kuroo feels his stomach sink. 

He rushes to look through the glass windows into the store, cell phone forgotten on the pavement, and what he sees makes his blood run cold.

_ "Bo!" _ He's on his knees next to the wounded man before he even registers moving, his hands cupping Bokuto's cheeks and heart trying to burst free from his chest- "God,  _ Bo-!" _

"Call the police!"

"We need an ambulance!"

"What happened?!"

He can hear people around them shouting, voices all blurring into the background, and one of the store employees has his hands clamped firmly over the bullet hole in Bokuto's chest, but all Kuroo can focus on is Bokuto's soft, white eyelashes fluttering against pale cheekbones- his honey colored eyes staring blankly at nothing- his slightly gaping mouth and labored breathing-

"Bokuto!" He cries, patting Bokuto's cheeks, trying to get his attention. Bokuto's eyes find his and the edges of his lips curl up in a small smile.

"Tetsu," he breathes. Kuroo shakes his head, throat tight.

"Don't talk- don't talk, Bo- just- just listen- just stay awake, alright?? Help is on the way- do you hear me??" He's fighting the warble in his voice. He sounds strained to his own ears. He doesn't realize how badly he's trembling until Koutarou's slightly chilled fingers wrap around the hand cupping his cheek.

"It looks like we won't make the movie today," Bokuto says quietly, bottom lip trembling but soft smile still in place. "Sorry about ruining our date."

"No," Kuroo sniffs, shakes his head, "don't talk like that. If you really feel bad about it you better make it up to me. I want the works, Bokuto Koutarou! Candies, flowers- I want a fancy dinner and a new coat-" he can feel hot tears streaking his cheeks but he ignores them. Bokuto's smile widens.

"Sure. Anything you want, Tetsu. I promise." his blinks are slower, his grip not as tight-

"Bo- Koutarou don't do this," he begs, patting Bokuto's cheeks again, "don't fall asleep!!" Fuck,  _ where is the ambulance?! _ "Koutarou!"

"'m sorry, Tetsu," Bokuto mumbles, eyes closed, "My eyes won't stay open… I'm so tired…"

"Don't fall asleep," Kuroo begs again, quieter, pressing his forehead against Bokuto's, "not now-  _ not now, Bo-" _

"I love you," Bokuto murmurs, eyelids fluttering again, "I love you, Tetsu," 

_ "The ambulance is here!" _ Someone cries and Kuroo would be weeping with joy if he wasn't already terrified-sobbing and clutching Bokuto like a lifeline-

Hands are pulling him up and away from Bokuto and all he can do is swipe at the tears streaming down his face and pray desperately to anything- _anyone-_ _please save Koutarou._

\---

"Kuroo, is this important?" Kenma's voice is hushed, his irritation plain, "I'm in the middle of a stream-"

"Bo's been shot," Kuroo croaks. His voice is wrecked, even to his own ears. He blinks at the white walls in front of him, eyes feeling puffy and head pounding. He sniffs, rubs the end of his nose with the sleeve of his sweater. "It's not good. He's in surgery right now and I… I'm waiting."

_ "Fuck," _ Kenma breathes, sounding almost as gut punched as Kuroo feels. "I'll be there in thirty minutes." Kenma promises. Kuroo hums softly before hanging up. It'll probably take longer than that, honestly. Kenma's flat and the local hospital aren't exactly close to one another. But, he knows Kenma will be here as soon as he  _ can _ be. 

He sniffs again, staring at the blackened screen of his phone. There's a crack in it now, from where he dropped it earlier, and Kuroo thinks it's a perfect match for how he feels inside right now.

The day started off amazing. He was happy- they were both happy. Bokuto had just popped in for some snacks. It was just supposed to be a quick errand. Kuroo's eyes begin to burn with tears again and he sniffs once more before hanging his head and burying his face in his hands, not even trying to stop them anymore.

How could things have gone so badly so quickly?

\---

“Kuroo,” Kuroo blinks at the white ceiling, not moving from his position sprawled across the ugly green bench. “Kuroo, you’re taking up the whole bench. It’s not polite to lay down in the waiting room.” Kenma chastises softly. Kuroo couldn’t care less, though. He’s the only one here in the surgery waiting area anyways. There’s plenty of open seats if someone needs one. The ex-setter sighs and Kuroo blinks when his best friend’s face suddenly fills his vision. “Kuroo.”

“You’re late,” Kuroo mumbles. “It’s been forty-five minutes.”

“I’m sorry,” Kenma apologises as he swipes Kuroo’s bangs aside. Kuroo gives a half shrug and lifts his head and shoulders off the bench. Kenma understands and sits down in the empty space, allowing Kuroo to rest his head on his lap so he can comb his hair through the inky black strands. “I brought food and coffee,” Kenma offers. Kuroo hums softly.

“Thanks.”

“Have you called his family yet?” Kenma asks after a long pause. Kuroo shakes his head.

“Not yet… I wanted to wait until I wasn’t a sobbing wreck.” Kenma nods, still combing his fingers through Kuroo’s hair. Kuroo doesn’t think he could handle Bokuto’s family being here right now. Especially if the worst case scenario happens. Kuroo’s dad and grandma found out about their relationship relatively quickly, considering he could never hide anything from that woman, but Bokuto’s parents were a little bit harder to tell. This is absolutely  _ not _ the time to break the news about their relationship. He  _ will _ call them, though. Once he can trust himself not to spontaneously start crying. Maybe once he knows for sure…

They sit in silence for a long time, Kenma’s fingers never stopping their soothing motions. Even as the setting sun begins to cast gold and pink hues around the room and Kuroo’s phone chimes in his pocket, ignored, they stay on that ugly green bench.

“Bokuto Koutarou?” Kuroo quickly sits up, narrowly avoiding smacking Kenma’s nose with his forehead. Kuroo’s heart is in his throat, but the woman at the doorway gives him a kind smile and shifts her clipboard.

“Bokuto-san is stable.” All at once, the tension in Kuroo’s body releases, “There was a bit of damage, but we managed to remove the bullet. He’ll be sore for a while, and there will be quite a few restrictions as far as physical activities, but he should make a full recovery.”

“Oh thank goodness,” Kenma breathes behind him. Kuroo nods seriously. 

“Can I- can we see him?” Kuroo asks, gripping the bench seat beneath his hands fightly. 

“Of course,” the nurse nods. “He’s sleeping now, and it’ll be quite a while before he comes out of it-”

“That’s fine,” Kuroo is already gathering his things, eager to see Bokuto alive- breathing- “That’s fine, I just-”

“I understand,” the nurse’s smile is soft.

\---

Kenma offers to call Bokuto’s family while Kuroo goes in to see him, and Kuroo is so incredibly grateful. 

But when he sees his normally exuberant boyfriend so still and pale, hooked up to more machines than Kuroo thinks necessary, he kind of wishes he was making the phone call instead of standing here at the foot of Bokuto’s hospital bed. He swallows down his fears and rounds the end of the bed to sit in the small chair situated beside the bed.

Maybe it’s because of the layers of blankets on his body, but Bokuto’s hand is warm when Kuroo carefully takes it in his own, making sure not to jostle the IV in the back of his hand. Feeling Bokuto’s warmth, his steady pulse, finally settles the anxieties and fears. He inhales deeply, ignoring the burn of hospital antiseptic in his nostrils, and bends down to rest his forehead against Bokuto’s knuckles.

“Don’t you  _ ever _ do this to me again, Bokuto Koutarou,” he whispers fiercely. “I just lost  _ ten years  _ off my life thanks to you.” he looks up at Bokuto’s sleeping face and sighs softly. “I’m glad you’re alright.”

\---

It takes a lot of convincing, but Kenma finally convinces Kuroo to leave the hospital that evening and return in the morning. 

“You need a shower, food, and a good rest,” Kenma argues, gathering up Kuroo and Bokuto’s things on his own. 

“What if he wakes up and I’m not here?” Kuroo frowns. 

“I think he’d prefer you went home and changed clothes, at the very least,” Kenma purses his lips, pointedly looking at Kuroo’s jeans. Kuroo frowns as he looks down.

“Oh,” he says softly. The knees of his jeans are stained a dark color with Bokuto’s blood and Kuroo feels his stomach do a backflip. “Right.”

“The nurse said it would be a while before he woke up,” Kenma continues, “we can come back first thing in the morning.” Kuroo nods and shoves his hands in the pocket of his sweater. 

He doesn’t wanna leave Bokuto’s side, but he wants even less to be wearing Bokuto’s blood. 

\---

Bokuto is awake when Kuroo comes in the next morning.

“Kuroo!” Bokuto’s smile is weak, but it still makes Kuroo’s heart soar. 

_ “Bo,” _ his relief is audible. He holds Bokuto’s hand again, and Bokuto’s smile widens. “You scared the shit out of me, you know that?” Kuroo huffs a laugh, eyes stinging just a bit. He refuses to cry today- he did  _ more _ than enough of that yesterday. 

“Sorry,” Bokuto apologizes, rubbing his thumb over the back of Kuroo’s hand. “I didn’t plan to get shot but uh,” he gives a half shrug and Kuroo scoffs.

“I don’t think anyone  _ plans _ on getting shot, Dummy.” Kuroo slips his left hand into his pocket, fingers finding the small metal key in his pocket and holding on tight. “You have to make up for our ruined date, though. You promised.”

Bokuto nods, “Anything you want,” he promises. “I’ll have plenty of time off from practice after this,” he huffs a small laugh before hissing and wincing, right hand coming up to rest on his bandage wrapped chest. 

“You alright?” Kuroo asks, eyes darting between Bokuto’s face and his chest. 

“I’m fine,” Bokuto assures. “They gave me pain meds but said I’m gonna be super sensitive and sore for a while.” Kuroo nods in understanding, some of his fear abating. 

“Then,” he continues, drawing Bokuto’s attention, “if I can have anything I want, I want you.”

“You already have me,” Bokuto grins, hand tightening around Kuroo’s. Kuroo shakes his head, still smiling.

“Yeah, but I’m greedy. I want  _ all _ of you.” Bokuto’s brows crease in confusion. “I want your mornings and evenings and weekends. I want your clothes in my closet and your shoes in my entryway. I want your movie collection on my shelf and your gross organic milks in my fridge. I want  _ all _ of it.” Bokuto’s eyes widen when Kuroo pulls out the key. “I want you to move in with me.” Bokuto stares at the key for a long minute, making Kuroo anxious, before smiling softly at Kuroo. 

“I snore, you know.” Kuroo huffs a laugh.

“Of course I know.”

“I sing in the shower,” Bokuto continues, “and I hate cleaning house. I practice a lot on the weekends, and I watching stupid variety shows until way too late at night-” he swallows, “and I get depressed sometimes. I’m- I’m not the easiest person to deal with. I can’t promise that I’ll always be smiling-”

“I don’t want you to always be smiling,” Kuroo interjects. “I don’t want you to have bad days either, but I know it happens. I know it happens and I want to be there for you when they do. I told you, I want all of you. The good, the bad, the obnoxious- all of it. I want all of it, Bo. Please move in with me.” Bokuto stares at him for a moment longer before nodding.

“Okay.” Kuroo breathes out a sigh of relief and it makes Bokuto’s smile widen, “Alright, yeah. Let’s move in together.”

“I love you, Kou,” Kuroo leans in to press their foreheads together, careful of Bokuto’s injury, heart fluttering when Bokuto’s hands come up to cup his cheeks, calloused thumbs stroking his cheekbones.

“I love you too, Tetsu.”


End file.
